Greetings All ~
I've never been a perfectionist. Far from it. Though I have tried, it's never worked for me. There are perfectionists in my life and I've tried it their way. The result was tension, anxiety, disappointment and sometimes downright temper tantrums. Not to mention a waste of time on the backend.
When I lived in NYC, I worked as a chef at a high-end catering company to support myself as a struggling musician. Talk about having to flex with ever-changing situations. There was a client who asked us to make a specific cake not on the regular menu. It came out perfectly. We had to transport it from our kitchens in north New Jersey to the United Nations for a gig. The whole drive was, "The cake! The cake! Be careful of the cake!" "No smoking in the van!" (we did that back in the day), driving ever-so-carefully through Manhattan's crosstown traffic. When we arrived, the head chef got out of the vehicle to speak to the security guard. When doing so, he tossed his utensil bag into the van, where it landed—you guessed it—right on the cake. We were horrified. What were we going to do? We couldn't buy such a specialty item. No time or ovens on site to build a new one. He sent one of the assistants to buy heavy cream. He whipped it up and filled in the cake. Fingers were crossed. The client said it was the best cake she'd ever had! So much for perfection.
I can listen to an old musical release and think, "My voice isn't very good there." "Why didn't we arrange it differently?" "If I did that song today I'd do X, Y or Z." Or, I can listen and find surprising gems by hearing inspired guitar parts or drum beats that magically support the melody line. I can listen with worry or enjoy the creative choices made at the time. I have a musician friend who's been working on the same album for over ten years. It's never "quite right." My experience with that mindset is, while the product gets better and better technically, the organic quality of artistry is being strangled. The original heart of it gets choked.
Perfectionism closes us off from being able to see things in different ways. Ways that may be better. It traps us into a structure. It puts blinders on us, keeping us from seeing other possibilities. Worse yet, it is the ego assuming it knows all the possibilities, when in fact, the possibilities are limitless. And finally, it's just a plain waste of time. Things almost never go as perfectly planned. Life, the Universe, God, whatever you want to call it, always throws in its two cents. Then our perfect plan has to be altered.
I've also tried flying by the seat of my pants. That's a time waster too, and in certain circumstances, can be expensive time- and money-wise (think studio or traveling costs). Living haphazardly can be just as flummoxing as trying to live perfectly. Being in-the-moment with a simple outline that accommodates flexibility opens us up to the Infinite. It leaves room for the beauty of what is possible. Just because we didn't think of it, doesn't mean certain other somethings don't exist. Leaving room for them is the adventure of life and is key to creativity and ease. It may seem scary sometimes but at least it didn't start with the perfectionist's initial fear of things "going wrong." Unplanned options can make improvements. How many times have we realized if the unexpected A hadn't happened, we wouldn't have discovered B, or made it to C?
We can escape the trap of perfectionism. When the unplanned "imperfection" appears, we can ask, "What do I do now?" with anxiety or curiosity. Because after all, nobody's perfect (thank God)!
Below is a link to the great Gilda Radner as her creation Roseanne Roseannadanna (accompanied here by Jane Curtin). This comic reminder has jostled me out of worry many, many times.
All Good Things,
Vicky Rose